| perfect trip |
[25 Nov 2009|11:37am] |
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The terrible decision to put out our campfire before we went into the woods, walking down to the lake with the GPS in hand, seeing deer and deciding to follow them, the redneck campers pointing the way passed their campfire and into the woods, "oh my god, we're so close. I thought we were on a cliff", Kyle bouncing on a broken tree trunk, packing goldfish into Jessica's bookbag, letting them free in the water, Eli losing the light-up eyeball, "there are 400 hundred stars!" "No actually there are millions", laughing harder than I ever have, putting on my gloves but not actually being able to, walking back to camp when it all kicked in, seeing the redneck campers again and asking how they are tonight, "not as good as ya'll are", seeing the stars out in the open, "I can't believe our camp is this close to the road!", laying on the mattress and all seeing a shooting star at once, climbing in and out of the cars, an unanimous vote to listen to "My Girls", sitting in the same backseat with Jessica because we thought a pile of clothes was another person, the eyeballs, changing the language on the GPS and dying to touch the favorites button, venturing to the bathroom, Eli telling us to look at the floor, Kyle flushing the toilet because it sounded like a monster, Josh panicking because we were all in the women's bathroom so we went to the men's, Eli pointing out the floor was the same but just as cool, Kyle flushed another toilet, a park ranger came in and we booked it out back to our camp, I yelled at Josh for the rest of the night, "do you remember when we went to the lake?", Maggie singing the Oscar Mayer Wiener song with me, THE EARS ALL NIGHT LONG, using the secret, everyone being on different levels, not being cold until someone told me it was cold, never getting a fire back, eating the spilled soggy goldfish off the table, Jessica eating a banana peel, thinking the tent was so big, all of us having different conversations at once but I could only hear the one I was in, realizing the tent was tiny when the sun came up, shivering it was so cold, Eli never responding, Jessica taking two more hits, really bonding with her, every once in a while someone would wander off, Maggie taking care of us all, Nick in daddy mode, making videos with no picture, deciding that cigarettes are really babies because they're so small and talking complete and total nonsense. I love my life.
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[21 Nov 2009|02:06pm] |
Bonfire last night was exceptional. I got to see TAYLOR JONES and her loverboy for the first time in agesss! I got to sleep in Kyle's bedroom at his parents house, eat bagels with his dad and my very best friends in the morning, and have my very first conversation with his mother while drunk. Ye!
Tonight: Camping in the freezing cold at the river/another fire/LSD trip. Sweet.
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[19 Nov 2009|02:54am] |
Someone come take care of me. Pay my rent and plug my ears and tell me when it's time to say no. I'm the most caring individual you know, I promise. But every day I leave for class I lock the door behind me, I can't let you in. It's a strange crazy ballgame, people. I have made a wishlist for the upcoming holidays that includes: throw pillows, a baking cookbook, curtain rods, riding boots, a faux fur coat, devendra banhart, a giraffe tattoo, money, a biggie t-shirt and kitten heels. This weekend I'm going to lose my mind entirely, with whatever it takes, because it's the insane house mate's joint birthday celebration. I'm still undecided on if this contentness is worth the rush of emotion I once had. I don't stay up all night anymore wishing for bike tires on my sidewalk, but instead I now have someone to always have my back when I need it. You know we're waiting for something special? With candles and slow music, I'm not completely sold on the idea of it actually happening. I know what it's like to feel loved, as well as untrusted. Right now I'm downright grimey. In all honestly, I'm just enjoying myself while I can. This is my very first year at college, I have my own apartment, my friends are the best people in the entire world, I'm so young and smart and somewhat beautiful, I have no choice but to take in this moment to realize how goddamn lucky I am. I'm so lucky to have made it out in time. So lucky to have legs that walk and a voice that talks and eyes that see and ears that hear and a brain that thinks. Every day I wake up and thank the universe for how amazing it's been to me, for all of these chances everyday to make my life, as well as others, more special. I make sure to always give bums change and listen to peoples words for as long as I can, uninterrupted, and smile. I don't have a pretty smile, but I do as big and bright and sincere as I can. I will do whatever it takes to make you happy, but I am my own person and I am the most important person in my life, therefore I come first. Not a bitch move, a smart one. Good advice for everyone:
Whatever you want to do, do it now. For life is time and time is all there is.
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[18 Nov 2009|09:33pm] |
My life as of late:
Left Wednesday night at 6pm for GMU, stayed the night at a frat (lame), left the next morning at 8am and made it back to RVA for my 11am class the next day. Win! I'm young, I'm avoiding, I'm enjoying this time in my life while I can. Also: A major picture dump/real entry is coming soon.
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[16 Nov 2009|12:35pm] |
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To begin with, I have made entirely too many mistakes in the last 24 hours. I am an idiot and I give in too easily and basically I just need to be slapped in the face. By Friday I'll be back on track, have a game plan, and make those close to me proud. I haven't been thinking clearly enough and it's really effecting everyone I know, especially those who's numbers I've somehow acquired. My "feeling sorry for myself" texting is just getting ridiculous. All in all, I guess I'm just trying to say I'm starting over........ now
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fleahead's journal